Hello blog,

Yes its been a long time.
Hope you have been while I had my enjoyment for the past 3 yrs.
So sorry that I have to come back here and say it all here again.
I feel so bad right now, that I used you just to pour my feelings but yeah, thats your job.
So bear with me and go through it with me again, like the old times.

This is so funny.
I had alot to type a few moments ago with all my angers and hatred ready to bombard this piece.
And now, it all seem to be empty.
Not because I dun want to post it here and let everyone know.
But its just too painful to recall it back and type it back here knowing it wont really pull off the pain from me.
Well,shall just take my time and post everything back here at my own pace.

Okay,so I just had an ugly break up and now we are starting slowly which I assume it was and now I am broken again.
Few days ago, we felt so good with each other warmth, trying to convince myself it will work out again step by step.
But today everything went crashing down again on me.
Saw her texting this jackass for most of the time I am out with her.
Okay fine, I know I did that too in the past and we were together and I paid no heed or pay whatsoever shit.
One good point is that now I know how it feels to be like her in the past and how its like to be me.
My heart felt and my eyes seen it.
Good.
But, it felt so bad that I couldnt do anything to that jackass as we are not in a relationshit anymore, I have no rights.
I am so jealous and angry that I could beat Mike Tyson out of the ring.
This is not me.
Now facing this, I came back to my past Lyn.
She did that too.
So this is a kind of phobia and I truly believe that this will happen again.
THIS,will happen to her and I will be back to square one.
THIS, is just the beginning and I am warning myself.
Staying away from her wont help, now that she also playing cool and calling herself stupid for giving her hope.
Now I duno what I am saying.

See what I mean?
It hurts to type back.

I have never felt so much jealousy with Inah before.
Never.
The only time I felt this much when I had my last relationshit.
And I was so possessive.
What I did was I keep fighting and hoping.
Now, I duno what I should do.
I told Inah before, get a better man.
I guess, when I said that, I was telling myself to prepare for this.
So this is it huh.
Its so sad that I have to go through this again.
Really sad.
All this time, I wanted to change and show her what I got to get it back.
And now, this jackass has come to take Rachael.

I dun want to continue this post anymore.

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