Mariska Hargitay

Friday, June 13, 2008

You told me you hate me.
You told me not to touch you.
You told me you wanted to forget me.
You told me you don't want to see me.
You told me fuck off.
You told me all those right to me.
Loud and clear.
I heard it.
I guess I was not dreaming.
It was reality.
I accept the facts.
I guess there is no turning back.
And I don't see why you were angry with me and cried.
It should be me.
Just because I talk to her?
You told me to understand you.
And I tried to learn to understand myself before I learn to understand you.
But did you even learn to understand me?
Did you even tried to?
At least learn to understand yourself.
I mistaken you.
I thought you were matured enough to think for yourself and understanding.
But it did not turn out right huh.
Lynette,I am human.
Humans have feelings.
Have you ever thought of how did I felt that time?
How hurting it was?
But it's okay.
Like what you said,it might be my 'retribution'
You can hurt me for all you want.
I deserve it I guess.
As long it makes you feel better,I am happy enough.
If I were to have a last wish,I wish to see you being happy and all.
I guess the anger in you and all gets the better of you.
I can say you are out of control already.
I just wish that you could change for the better.
Even when I tried to give in,you still wanted to go your own ways.
I know you're stuborn.
But that can't be the reason right.
Hai
At the meantime,I am trying to let go of what has happen.
It was Friday the 13th.
Our fucking 19th month anniversary.
I thought it was our day and we could spent time together thinking how we have gone this far even though we are not together.
I am proud of the fact that we came this far and went through challenges.
I know there are yet more obstacle to go.
But I am willing to face it.
I want you to know that I care for you.
No matter what,I am still standing here for you lynette.
I even went all the troubles and meet you to give money so that you can go home safely.
I was worried that you walked home and get lost or what.
Little did you know that I didn't finish my food and faster meet you.
I just took a big spoon only for goodness sake and left.
But it doesn't matter to me.
Cos to me,you are more important.
I will do anything it takes to make you feel happy and all.
You told me that I will be happy after 5th june.
Did you mean what you said?
Alright,I guess that is all.
I can't possibly tell everything here.
Take care lovely.

posted at 11:53 PM by Ammar | Permalink |

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