I was touched when you said you wanted to give a surprise actually.
But I was upset that you could not make it the end for real.
I wasnt in the mood before the dance.
Because of you.
I wanted you to watch me for the last time before we go our own path.
But no,you were not there.
I guess,my life is that miserable.
Dancework taught me alot.
I understand that your eye hurts.
But you could actually go out with him.
He could go to your house and spent time with you.
Unlike me,I cant even go to your house with your parents inside.
I wish to meet them but I cant cos I know they will not be happy.
But for him,they dun mind him going your house.
My hands are dying to hug you.
I want to be with you.
I lovee you so much.
Now is 28th March.
Lynette,why are you so dead?
You dun seem to care about me.

---

Lynette,I have noticed you been moody and all.
And when I msg you,you seem to reply so short when I know you are usually long winded.
What happen?
I thought these few days before I am gonna leave you,
We could talk like how we used to.
Cos right now,I feel like youre gone.
But I am just being understanding and patient.
You got a problem,but you wish not to reveal to me for fear that I might get hurt.
Its okay baby.
I am just so sad of losing you,again and its the final.
You may think its stupid for me to do this.
You can have your say cos I know I dun have to do this but I choose to.
Like you said before,you told me on the phone that night.
You said,"You stupid,bodoh."
And I will always believe you.
Cos it has prove me right.
I cried every night,here and there.
Wishing what I could do to make you love me back.
But its useless.
You wont return to me ever again.
Yet,I am still holding on that hope.
Leona told me,if I believe Lynette will come back,she will.
I hopes God answer my wish.
Remember the wish we always wish upon the brightest star?
The wish that we made to marry each other?
Does it still exist?
Hai.
I miss and love you so much.
Its 4 days left before its April.
I dun even know if you are aware.
Just know that down deep,I want you.

Time is short.

---

Hai.
I duno why I am such a crybaby.
But I am just so disappointed about you.
You say you like this guy and all.
Yet,you still put his pic as his screensaver.
What are you exactly trying to say?
Imran?Randy?
What happen to them?
Whats the story?
I have yet to know everything.
But I dun wish to know cos it hurts.
Believe it or not,I am telling you this again.
I dun msg you or call you,cause the thought of you just hurts me.
Even the mention of you is like a stab to my heart.
Cos it always remind me of you,what you did and all.
Plus now,you got your duno who in your list.
The thought of us can just make me tears.
You know it hurts me when you said it was good that we spent little time.
But I understand,that we are in THIS situation.
Theres so much pain and I am wondering when it gonna end.
(When I know,it will be forever.)
I love you so much still.
You couldnt understand why I went to Lyndra.
There was reason why I did.
But I know you are not gonna believe me.
Cos whatever I am saying now,wont affect you.
Maybe its been 3years long you been hearing the same old thing.
Thats why you dun give a damn about what I am saying.
Even saying I love you to you won't affect one bit.
But when others say it,you be affected by their sweet romance.
Why Lynette?
WHY?!
WHY?WHY?WHY?WHY?
Randy,WHY DID YOU TOOK HER AWAY?!



And the last thing that is above all,
The more I care, the worst I could have ever felt.

---

Even though we didnt make it to top three,
We won the MOST SUPPORTIVE AWARD!
Thank for the whistle and 'loudspeaker'.
It isnt about winning or losing,its about showing your talent to the world.
Once again,congrats!
WE WON SOMETHING AT LEAST!!!
:D

---

First of all,I would to thank my dad.
Thanks for making this wonderful picture.
Thanks for even taking the trouble to make a video of us.
Even though you were unaware of our situation,I am very touched.
So now pop,I have told you what our situation.
I know you had no intention to hurt me,but I am very understand-able son.
Hah.
So Lynette,happy 40th.
Its okay if you were tired.
Cos I know you wouldn't be the first one to wish.
Maybe it wasnt important to you or what.
Its okay.
We are moving on.
And now Lynette,I am sorry that I cried that Friday when we met.
It just hurts me and all when I see you breaking down.
It hurts me that you really love him.
I have only have to point the finger to myself and say I am stupid.
And when you lean on me,I was thinking.
Your hair brushing against my cheeks.
Your warm breath I felt for the past 3years.
Your weight against my shoulder.
It will be gone too soon.
These feelings will never come back.
I cried,knowing well that you will never be mine again.
I cried,when you embrace me in your arms.
I cried,cos I was so touched that you were so nice to me after all those harsh stuff you gave me.
That moment was like when I really know its you.
The Lynette I knew.
I love you so much.
Each time I leave you,I am so scared and sad.
Cos I duno if thats the last time I am seeing you.
Whatever happens,I want you to be happy okay.


I love you.

---

Okay,so now I realised that I am flirt.
The only time I flirt was when I was with Lyndra.
Seriously,what I am doing with her is call Flirting.
Maybe,I dun even know whats flirting.
So even when I am talking to a girl,I am flirting?
I mean,how do I even flirt?
I have ask some people how is it I am flirting.
And the answer was the was I talk was like I was close to them.
But to think of it,if I am their close friends,and I still talk to them,am I flirting.
Why cant people accept that I am in fact,close to everybody?
But I have to say this.
I am getting annoyed that people keep saying I am flirt.
You know,I just keep quiet but in fact,I am burning inside when you all says Im a flirt.
But I have no choice but to accept the fact.
And now I am trying to stop this action call Flirting.
And I need to know how to not flirt,since I dun not know whats flirting is.
Teach me.

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